Tag: listening
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The silence often of pure innocence persuades when speaking fails.
I get tired of arguing; tired of explaining over and over what seems perfectly clear to me. But I sometimes wonder if in that rush of words which creates the most anger is where she feels the most comfortable. There is little space for debate in a shouting match; there is even less for weighing…
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Art thou not sensible to feeling as to sight?
Where do I stop; where are my boundaries? Is my pencil part of my brain when I write myself a note? Should a blind person’s cane with which they navigate the world be considered an extension of their hand -of their mind -since it warns of obstacles much like their eyes? For that matter, is…
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It is the disease of not listening, the malady of not marking, that I am troubled withal
‘Listening is the dark matter of a conversation.’ I love that quote; it’s from an essay by the British poet Faith Lawrence.[i] We have many ways to describe the things to which we listen: words that catalogue those things that result in sound -like singing, laughing, whispering, shouting- but precious few that describe actually attending…
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Who has heard the seasons pass?
Is absence the same as presence? Is it simply the opposite end of a spectrum in which both have identifiable, if different, properties? If something isn’t there, we don’t see it, and although we can maybe imagine it, that’s not really seeing it, is it? Surely the presence of something exists in a different Magisterium…
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The time is out of joint
It came as a great shock, of course -Youth does not easily admit defeat: it lives as if there is always a tomorrow, will always be a tomorrow. The sun will rise after any darkness; day will always follow night. Youth is immortal, although perhaps it is that death is further away than they can…
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The Doors of Persuasion
The Doors of Perception, by Aldous Huxley -I loved that book; I read it when I was a teenager and was intrigued by the idea that there could be doors to abstractions as well as to rooms -doors to other areas, other places. Invisible portals that existed alongside more tangible things, and yet magical, somehow…
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The Grief that does not Speak
How weary, stale, flat, and unprofitable seem to me all the uses of this world! Like Hamlet, we all recognize this mood: the black dog lying in the noonday sun, the cloud that even hides the moon. It is the tear that defeats the wavering smile –and yet… And yet, there is often something more…
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Fertility options
Some people would do anything to become pregnant: undergo painful procedures, borrow money, mortgage their homes –anything, it seems, to have a child. While this is certainly understandable –parenthood is perhaps the raison d’être of our genes- it seems a shame that fertility would be something denied to some while granted to others. Arbitrary at first glance,…
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The Science of Answering
I suppose in this suspicious age, everything is open to scrutiny. But some things are examined at one’s own risk risk -like turning over a familiar log in the garden only to find unexpected and sinister-looking creatures lurking quietly beneath. This is fine, of course, but it can be hard to know what to do…
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When Silence is Golden
Silence is golden; it can also be difficult. Many of us find it uncomfortable -awkward if it continues for too long. In communication, silence is a benefit that diminishes with time, a value that becomes a penalty. A schism that is counterproductive. We all want to be heard; we all need to be recognized, and…
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